Easter trip to Triavna

Triavna is a very beautiful small town in central Bulgaria.
We went there with my parents for Easter, on the 23 april.
Funny enough the weather couldn't make up its mind and started and stopped raining about one thousand times. I guess it was part of the agenda:) some crazy rainy cloud to go after us and "cry" from time to time...
I have never been to triavna before, although it is really close to Veliko Turnovo. And I have missed a lot. It is really beautiful and colourful and "European" I was left dumb-struck at the view of the Municipality building, with all the neat flowerbeds and fountains in front...Even more puzzled when I understood that there is a Museum of Asian and African art in this small town. Some local art-teacher, now living in New York has donated his collection of ancient icons, masks, jewelery and ritual items....Really amazing...
Of course it was so calm and pleasant to walk down the streets (although it was drizzling) and discover strange places ( such as the pensioners' club where you had to be a member to be allowed to enter and non-members could only come and have a very quick drink - not more than 10 minutes)...
Then ...we were travelling back home and in one of the villages nearby i was surprised to discover that people are gathering their garbage separately.While in Sofia it is still so surprising to see this happening, people at this village had quite a lot of colourful dustbins for "Paper", "Plastic" and "Others"...Who knows...Maybe Eouropean attitude came there earlier :)
For the more curious to see - check this link

We come one...

Recently I started discovering Sofia...
Maybe because it is spring, and everything is re-born...I hated the winter...And in the summer I was too obsessed to think about my challenges in AIESEC and my so called "love"...
Indeed I am starting to get more and more sceptical about love...But this should be a separate post.
I am starting to "feel" Sofia, to really love it, no matter the ugly buildings, never-smiling people and dirty streets...It is ALIVE, the city has its rythm, its face, its smells and sounds, its typical characters, its landmarks.
It is almost losing its breath with the traffic-jams...hectic...nervous...and only a few meters away...some small and not very clean park...children playing in the sand...people lining up to get into the church (it is Holy Friday today), gipsy women selling flowers they have plucked from someone's garden...
It is not "european" ...It is so much Balkan and so much typical for Sofia.
I found out how exciting it is to find out every day a new place, a new face...just like getting to know a friend...The city has its good and its bad days and moods...
And as time passes I start tuning in the city's frequency...I guess this is adaptability. And also...it changes your perception somehow, as it becomes a part of your memories.
It will not be the same again.
I am afraid Sofia will loose its charm. They are building like crazy. Cars are eating every single cantimeter of the city. Less flowers, more garbage. Less smiles, more elbow-pushing.
Hope the government will wake up and do something...And we should sustain it.
Which, having in mind the Bulgarian lack of ownership to public property, will be a hard task...
Good luck in changing the mindset of your citizens Sofia:)

my emotional self speaking...

Why should I feel OK with the fact that someone told me " I will be with you forever...I want you to be a mother of my children...I will go till the end of the world for you"...and then ...some months after start speaking about his new "love"...
Oh, please, give me a break...I do not believe in "forever"...I believe in egoism. I appreciate it. People should have their choices and when you love them - you should let them go...Love...Ha...Is it possible that I feel the person I felt closest now to be so far away...He slept in my bed yesterday. I was worried not to touch him accidentially...as if he would burn me...
I am so worried to touch the other one too. I don't want to scare him away. Although I know he will never come as close as I need him to come...
Never is such a bad word...like forever...
Why should we have time and space.
I know that what I need is beyond them.

Ira enjoying Bulgarian tolumbichki:) before leaving again for Moscow...I will miss this crazy girl... 

Inner strength

It is amazing how a single small thing can ruin my whole evening and the day after.
I just had a meeting...and it didn't happen...So what?
Things like this shouldn't influence me at all. Yet sometimes I find it hard to keep my cool.
I am trying to find the core thing that is going to keep me whole even in such moments. But I am over emotional, sensing the world not only with my 5 senses, but also with my soul i guess. And when something happens it is touching me very deeply.
I was talking to Armando, he was trying to give me a reasonable explanation of how feelings should be slaves to the rational-self. I dunno if I will be able to master this through my life - I guess I should do it, as otherwise it will be quite a painful experience.
I am thinking that maybe I should start practicing some religion or philosophy...Budhism or something...Or maybe I should just reflect more, let the rational self tame the irrational "me".
Progress is very slow...

On a day like this...

Friday. Any Friday can be...Nothing special.
Yesterday I was thinking a lot about my term as MCP. About my successor. Does he listen to me, when I am trying to convey my message...Does he think I can give him something...Maybe not. It hurt me, cause I felt a bit useless. I have the knowledge and experience. Yet I am not the winner, the role-model MCP that I should be. Maybe I made more mistakes than I was allowed to make. Maybe my good intentions were just left good intentions...
Yet I love my choice to become MCP. I believe it was necessary. I believe that I have made a difference - a very small one maybe. And the difference was that I was honest to people. I cut off politics. When I made a mistake I had the guts to stand and admit it.
It is not a big deal.
Today I spoke with one of the MC elect girls - Cveti. She is so smart:) Started elaborating on the topic of "why we do not succeed as aiesec country"...such interesting thoughts. It is so sad that we hardly ever have time to sit and just "talk" about different aspects of our life and society. We can gain a lot from this and this is some of the most enjoyable and enriching experiences.
Anyways...I sincerely hope that the new MC team will be able to take at least a little bit from us. I sometimes feel like a mother, preaching to her children...And they do not listen...I know now how a mother feels :)

Evrika!!!

Yesterday I was attending the BBLF master class in tourism and hospitality management. The lecture was by Ivan Todorov, manager of Todoroff Winery. He was amazing... He was speaking with such passion and love about the wine and about realizing his dream...actually, he made an unique stylish brand out of nothing for less than five years.
I asked him what did he find as most difficult in the beginning and he just said..."nothing". Simply nothing, cause he loved what he did and all the obstacles seemed only temporary...
And, while he was speaking it dawned on me...the thing that I want to do in life. My future job...I realised that I want to work in a hotel, or agency organising events and festivals.That is the thing that I have been searching for so long...Now that I have found the way I have to start climbing...Yet I doubt it that my way will be straight, I somehow have the feeling that there will be many stops and curves...

dance is in my blood...

Yesterday was amazing.
All about "lazy Saturday afternoon" with drinking chocolate mocca in ONDA, shopping and meeting nice people.
I haven't been having such a lazy day for a long time. Shame on me, but I even didn't spare a single minute thinking about AIESEC or any "serious" matter...
Yet it was so nice.
After spending some money and a good deal of "window shopping":), we went for a salsa lessson.
The instructur this time (Moni) was quite nice- smiling and obviously enjoying the lesson. Well, so did I , though my dancing was a real tragedy, not having danced for an year now...Yet I believe dancing, especially Latin dancing is in my blood...Maybe I have been living in some Latin country in one of my previous lives:)
And - the most amazing surprise of the day - Gery had invitations for the Finals of Latin dancing contest! So, I found myself in the VIP lounge , overlooking the dancing podium. So much beauty, grace and passion...
Oh, can't wait for the next salsa lesson:)