Friday, I'm in love

Almost single...looking for a Punjabi ;)

Reading "Almsot single" has been enough fun, yet who knew that i could be involved in a husband-hunt in real life.
Today, after a very agitated discussion over lunch my two bosses decided that I am a true Punjabi girl.
I behave like a Pujabi (understand - make dramatic gestures and wobble my head)
I talk like Punjabi
I eat like Punjabi (tandoori chicken is among my favourites, yet i have heard that Punjabi food is generally very oily)
I dress like Punjabi
Well...I really have no clue ...I had to take their word for it for the sake of everyone's entertainment.
The most funny part was when they decided to get me a registration in one of these matrimonial sites , put a picture and get me a Punjabi husband :))))
Then, I could live in a big house, have a Mercedes and a washing machine to make lassie in (i couldn't actually believe it, but it turned out that these people really use washing machines to make lassie!)
So...that's the news...I am going to wait for my filthy rich and pretty hairy Punj prince to come on a white horse...or rather a white BMW :)))

low

the sky was low today
i was waiting for a storm that never came
tired of the thick, tense air
almost feeling the solitude sticking to my skin
missing people
feeling distant
not a part of the puzzle
or part of a different puzzle
feeling that love is more evasive than ever
i so much need a God's sign these days
but i am probably too shortsighted to find it in little everyday things
but as it is said in one of my favourite songs
"it's a new dawn, it's a new day and i'm feeling good"
let's see what the new dawn brings :)

rainy

it has been raining restlessly for the past almost 20 hours
it's like livin in an underwater world
the only thing that i am thinking of the whole day is a nice, cosy place
a cup of thick hot chocolate and long easy-going conversation about life with someone i have just discovered
tomorrow we are all going to this amazing Mocha place - i fell in love even before i have stepped in
the whole melancholic mood of this week that went down the drain like a dream
makes me think of an ella fitzdjerald song that boris had given me.

Everytime we say goodbye, I die a little,
Everytime we say goodbye, I wonder why a little,
Why the Gods above me, who must be in the know.
Think so little of me, they allow you to go.
When you're near, there's such an air of spring about it,
I can hear a lark somewhere, begin to sing about it,
There's no love song finer, but how strange the change from major to
minor,
Everytime we say goodbye.

When you're near, there's such an air of spring about it,
I can hear a lark somewhere, begin to sing about it,
There's no love song finer, but how strange the change from major to
minor,
Everytime we say goodbye

Have a good weekend...

Kiss me goodnight...

Kiss me goodnight...
long enough...
i will guide you out of this world.
take my hand and play with my fingers.
as long as I want to...or long enough...you will know.
kiss my fingertips
one by one
touch my palms with your lips
let me feel your warm breath going up my arms...caressing my shoulders...moving my untidy hair
stop and linger for a while
let me look in your smiling eyes
smile
close your eyes
we are so close that your face is almost touching mine
stay like this for a while
keep your eyes closed
then slowly...as if hesitating
find my lips
cover them with tiny tiny kisses
then bite them
.....use your imagination to wish me "sweet dreams"
Good night my dear.

Hunger

Some dishes require more attention than others.
They need to be savoured slowly to get their real taste.
At first you would say they taste strange, even bitter...but in a a while , when the palate gets used to that...you sense a whole lot of flavours.
Sweet and sour and spicy and tingy...A hint of dark chocolate. Orange and black pepper. Something melting in your mouth...
Don't rush with these dishes. You could just spoil the taste...
If you are not ready to dedicate the time...just choose another item on the menu.

Natural drugs

On a Saturday morning, a list of 45 things that really make u happy...

1. Falling in love.
2. Laughing so hard your face hurts.
3. A hot shower.
4. No lines at the supermarket.
5. A special glance.
6. Getting mail.
7. Taking a drive on a pretty road.
8. Hearing your favorite song on the radio.
9. Lying in bed listening to the rain outside.
10. Hot towels fresh out of the dryer.
11. Chocolate milkshake (vanilla or strawberry).
12. A bubble bath.
13. Giggling.
14. A good conversation.
15 The beach
16. Finding a 20 dollar bill in your coat from last winter.
17. Laughing at yourself.
18. Looking into their eyes and knowing they LOVE you
19 Midnight phone calls that last for hours.
20. Running through sprinklers.
21. Laughing for absolutely no reason at all.
22. Having someone tell you that you're beautiful.
23. Laughing at an inside joke with FRIENDS
25. Accidentally overhearing someone say something nice about you.
26. Waking up and realizing you still have a few hours left to sleep.
27. Your first kiss (either the very first or with a new partner).
28. Makiig new friends or spending time with old ones.
30. Having someone play with your hair.
31. Sweet dreams.
32. Hot chocolate.
33. Road trip with friends.
34. Swinging on swings.
35. Making eye contact with a cute stranger.
36. Making chocolate chip cookies.
37. Having your friends send you homemade cookies.
38. Holding hands with someone you care about.
39. Running into an old friend and realizing that some things (good or bad) never change.
40. Watching the expression on someone's face as they open a much desired present from you.
41. Watching the sunrise.
42. Getting out of bed every morning and being grateful for another beautiful day.
43. Knowing that somebody misses you.
44. Getting a hug from someone you care about deeply.
45. Knowing you've done the right thing, no matter what other people think.

My world

India is a country where you can rarely get privacy.
With so many people around you are always bound to have someone intruding your personal space (even if the person might not be doing it deliberately). In our place u-59 as we live like a big family - there is constantly someone in our room...
That makes me treasure my moments of solitude even more. I am a very social person, but I need this time spent in my own world.
To think, dream or create characters and plots in my mind.
There is something playfully childish to be able to isolate yourself from the outside world and just observe.
Today I got the chance to do it -I was listening to my music and describing my India experience, while observing the two friends of mine chatting.There were two different worlds...
Sometimes I really feel sorry for those, whose inner world is deserted or full of too many elements of reality and dqily prose. Must be very sad and boring sometimes...

Just like that...

Darkness ocassionally broken by soft lightning.
Clouds with silver lining.
Gentle wind playing with my hair.
Making breathing (and probably living) possible.
I am listening to this.
Thinking...or feeling...
I am just like that...

asking nasty questions
building castles in the sky
being cruel and sarcastic
blaming myself
feeling too much


My curse is to be distant.
Detached, separated and ever-evasive.

loving beautiful things sometimes can hurt.
but can't pain be beautiful?


...I am so tired...
But a man has to do what a man has to do.

Good friends we had...good friends we've lost

A lot of friends are leaving these days. Closer friends, or just people that I like. People that have become a part of my life in a way.
Torill...Nata...Isabel...
soon Neeraj...Francois...Henk...Julie...Peter...Burcu...Jenny...
Our "home" in Gurgaon is constantly changing, and I am trying to keep a stiff upper lip, cause if I start to cry about everyone who is leaving, the monsoon will look like a drizzle.
So many people leaving made me think about all my friends I have around the world.
And brings back so many sweet memories, but also raises the question...
Will I be able to spend quality time with these people again? How much have we changed? Will I be able to call them friends?
It will never be the same again...
But why does it have to be the same?
You tought me one important lesson - live for the moment and cherish every single second you have spent with the people you love. Now this lesson is back to remind me I should learn to let go.
Neeraj said something really beautiful:"I want to be happy and to be sad, to enjoy every minute of the happiness and sadness, cause only then I will know I have lived"
We meet people for a reason...maybe this is the answer to a long-posted question.

Tonight...

Too much sex yet too little erotica...
So sad :(

Happiness

Today was one of the happiest days of my life.
I received so much pure, unconditional love that I feel extremely elevated, and the world bursts out in amazing bright colours.
What happened?
We had a volunteer initiative in Alcatel-Lucent - we brought 70 children from the slums to an amusement/water park.
I was responsible for those two beauties - Monica and Radha:)
So we were chasing around, going on marry-go-rounds, climbing ropes and throwing balls at each other.
Then there was the pool. Splashing water, jumping in it, playing wildly...
I was the first among the adults to get inside. And when one of the guys said that he got inspired by me to jump and play with the kids...it sounded so nice.
I felt a bit sad that I could not answer when "my children" were excitedly pulling me and shouting something in Hindi.
But one thing i knew without having to use any language.
They were happy.
They loved me.
I loved back.
What more do I need to be happy?

India...4 months later

Well, here I am.
A little more than 4 months since my journey began.
It would be an understatement to say "I learned a lot".
Probably I will be able to understand how much I have learned after some time...
I also cannot say that I am able to understand India.This is a country so colourful and diverse, so full of contardictions and contrasts, that you cannot ever say you have figured it out.
My feelings for India are as contrast as that - there are things I love and things I hate, but for sure I feel strong for that country and for its future. I kind of feel it as a second home already:)
What happened in these 4 months...
I went to some places I have never imagined that I will go.
Udaipur, Jaipur, Rishikesh, Nainital, Agra, Kajiraho, McLeaod Ganj...
Done crazy things (like jumping into Ganges)and rafting.
Laughed a lot. Cried a bit.
Partied hard.
Met some amazing people.Made some friends maybe.
Got enchanted by people. Got dissapointed by people.
Made stupid mistakes. Forgave.
Learned a few Hindi words.
Almost got used to spicy food.
Been disturbed. Achieved peace of mind.
Got a few steps closer to happiness.
I have a tentative plan where I want to go. It might be changed overnight.
That's the beauty of it.
Now it is more important to live.
Cause it is, for sure, a pretty exciting life!

Questions of a troubled mind...

Why do people always have a double agenda?
Is it good to let go?
Should we believe in Love?
Not judge people for the means they use to get what they want?
How to live light heartedly?
Why can't you be like the others?
Will you follow your dream?
How long can you go?
What happens after...

Give me a reason to ...

I'm so tired, of playing
Playing with this bow and arrow
Gonna give my heart away
Leave it to the other girls to play
For I've been a temptress too long

Just. .

Give me a reason to love you
Give me a reason to be ee, a woman
I just wanna be a woman

From this time, unchained
We're all looking at a different picture
Thru this new frame of mind
A thousand flowers could bloom
Move over, and give us some room

Give me a reason to love you
Give me a reason to be ee, a woman
I just wanna be a woman

Matched!

It has already been two days and i still cannot believe it! Everybody was telling me how hard it is to find a proper AIESEC traineeship, that it takes so much effort and long months of sending e-mails.
Well, I got matched to the first position I applied. Maybe it is beginners luck :) Maybe it is destiny!
Ta-da-dam!
Alcatel-Lucent in India, here I come.
One year in Corporate communications in one of the most amazing countries in the world.
Working along with a Brazilian guy and a Lithuainian girl as AIESEC trainees in Bangalore and Chennai. Challenging myself. Learning a lot. Living a different culture.
The journey will start in less than two months.
I have always believed that there are roads that have to be followed.This is such a road. It might be difficult, unexpected, uncomfortable, dirty and long. Yet I have already stepped on it and I will walk till the end. Sure it will be an exciting journey!

I was accused of not writing here ;)

Today Boris (oh my dearest beloved Boris that has the habit of interrupting just when I am trying to work) accused me of not updating this blog. So I thought "OK, might be high time I wrote something. I am too busy writing in the Bulgarian blog and twittering indeed ;)
So, wazzup :)
I had a veery serious dilemma if I should change my job - I was unexpectedly headhunted by another media. After two weeks of intense decision making, I decided to stay where I am and...yupee, search for an AIESEC traineeship. Anything connected with Media, PR and Communications is warmly welcomed!
The new collegue came, so I am finally moving to the Careers and Management section of the Paper. God Almighty - what a miracle :)Of course, the new boss already found me some work for the first weeks!
Anyway, before that, I will allow myself a one week vacation, going to Varna and then home. I dunno what a vacation it might be with French studies around the corner, but still, I will be away of the office, that's pretty good!
Then, I am seriously considering to join a course of the London school of PR and on finishing it, I might have found some nice traineeship :)
Looks like it is going to be an interesting autumn!

I am clever. It is proven ;)

Funny that I haven't taken the time to take an IQ test so far.
I decided to do it today, as tomorrow I will be going to an intervew for an International sales position which includes an intelligence test.
So, after two tests (sorry, I was too tired to do more) I scored somewhere between 115 and 122 points which, put into words, must mean that I am above the average intelligence level :)
However, I strongly believe emotional intelligence is also important, so I would also search for some EQ tests. Suggestions anyone?

The 200 post - It seems I am addicted to blogging after all :)

72%How Addicted to Blogging Are You?

Sacramento Singles from Mingle²

August press-clipping ;)

As you might know part of my job is to read newspapers. And look what I found - an article dedicated to me :) In case you feel as self-centred as me or just if you want to see how it feels to be a journalist - click here.
Enjoy and remember - do not manipulate the readers!

The sea, the sea ...

I am ashamed to admit that form my long 25-year long life, I have never been in Burgas, actually, only passed through there.
So, when Maya (or Zayo, as most of us know her) asked - is there anyone who wants to come to Burgas with me - I was the first volunteer :)
So, here it was - my first visit to the Black sea coast this summer.There is such a strange rule - whenever you live near the sea - you almost do not notice it, you take it for granted, when you are away - you miss it...
We took the Friday 4 o'clock bus, and because not all of the road is a highway, reached 6 hours later.
Zayo's parents were, of course awaiting us, her mum, a very nice woman had prepared us a dinner.They made me the impression of very hospitable people and huge fans of sun-bathing - went to the beach at 8 in the morning every day.
Saturday was a fully scheduled day - we woke up, had a nice home-made breakfast and went to the beach in Sarafovo, which seemed to be nicer than the one in Burgas. We stayed only two hours or so, and it was not quite sunny, yet at the end of the day I felt I was a bit sunburnt.


After the beach, I managed to convince Zayo to go to the city centre (she didn't want to, cause all the people were dressed up and they would stare at us as we looked like idiots in our beach-wear. Well, anyay, who cares?!).
We walked on the beach and I had a few of these precious moments when I just stared at the magic waves and the sky, breathing the fresh air and feeling in a completely parallel Universe.
Then we had lunch-o-dinner with Zayo's cousin who seemed a cool guy and gave us very useful instructions on where to drink what.

The evening was committed to drinking sexy-named cocktails (Sex on the beach, Falling bikini, Double orgasm were only a few of the names) with Zayo and Kateto (who was so much sunburnt, that you could easily fry an egg at her leg). Marvelous!
We went to the beach to check how people were preparing to meet JULY MORNING. I expected more people, gathered around huge fires, drinking beer and playing the guitar. We saw mostly drunk teenagers and a few enthusiasts that seemed to carry the hippie spirit in themselves. I felt so grown up and out of space. For the first time I wished I was 15 again (when I was 15 I actually was thinking like a 30 -year old, but that's another story).
The moon was a perfect circle.
Strange, tempting.
Bitter yellow.
We sat for a while, listening to the music from the nearby disco.
Then we just went home.
Sunday was devoted to the beach again...then a quick nap. I awoke as if awaking from a nice dream. I had to be back to reality.

One more bit of the real me stayed on the bus...I read Haruki Marukami's "Sputnik, Sweet Hart" - a very nice book on love friendship and loneliness.
We are all metal pieces circling the earth in their own orbits. Sometimes we meet for a while. Then we part, without promising each other anything.
Some of us come back.
If they have the guts to do so.

Gay bachelor's party - WTF?

Yesterday I was invited to a gay bachelor's party.
I dunno why immediately when I heard the invitation I pictured myself among 20 gays and lesbians and one stupid man-streaper.
It gave me the shivers just to imagine that:)
And I am not homo-fobic.
Let's just say - enough is enough for now with gay friends!

Brian Molko - my taste for androdynous men

Now you see - I am crazy :)

Then and now

Me, one year ago in Varna, just before finishing University and starting my job at Capital.
Excited:)


Me,in Krakow, one year after I started being a journalist.
Disillusioned:(
Learned a lot:)

One of those days...

Today was one of those days...
You know what I am talking about - the days that are all full of little nice surprises and accidental meetings that make you happy:)
Well, going out to the office (as today is a normal working day, as tomorrow will be) I saw on the front door that my first postcrossing card had arrived from Finland:) Yupee!
I walked a bit down the street and just bumped in an old friend I have lost completely track of:) It was great to get her mobile number again (last time I tried to call, some guy picked up and insisted that there is "no such girl here") :)
Then, I had to work a bit...well, I really do not like working on weekends, but my trip to Krakow has to be compensated with an extra workload obviously.
After work I met a friend and we visited the "book fair" in the National palace of culture. I bought five (yes, five ;) ) books - mostly children's books - Karlson, who lives at the roof, one Bulgarian book, Winnie the Pooh's Dao and Pigglet's D and one 'serious' book by Haruki Murakami :)
I decided to visit some friends in Studentski grad and while travelling met one of the sweet salsa instructors. I have never talked to him much, so it was cool to discuss books and stuff. Actually on the bus back I met him once again, which was rather funny :)
I realized that the Placebo concert will take place on the 18th June (not 15th as I first understood), so...if my bus comes back from Poland in the right hour, I might be able to get to the concert! I want it so much...
Then, on coming back home I found another postcard from an unknown girl lying on my table. A beautiful photo of Lisbon (which I want to visit so much).
I love such days - they show me that sometimes things just happen. When you need them to.

Big Google is watching you!

Today I read an article about the Google personalized pages (IGoogle) and I thought how transparent I actually am by being registered at so many places on the web.
Let me see...
I am using Gmail, Google reader, Blogger, Google of course...
Then - 4 (or something like that) more mails.
Another couple of blogs.
Several registrations for different websites (Postcrossing, Hi5, LinkedIn,YouTube, Flickr)
Oh, my! Feels a bit scary when I think that my personality is exposed to such an extent.
I do not even mean the things I write explicitly here. I mean the "secret" connections, the visits to different websites that show some kind of a consumer pattern.
When I first read about people getting more and more transparent with the usage of technology (it was something like 10 years ago, when I didn't even dream about having a PC)I was a bit sceptic...
Now I know that Big Google (and not only)is watching me!

My visual DNA

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Rain

It has been raining for two days now.
It makes me a bit melancholic.
But Sofia is so clean and beautiful after the rain. And I feel so full of hope,beauty and dreams...
I am thinking of my favourite "rain" songs:

Singing in the rain

November rain

Kiss the rain

I'll take the rain

Purple rain

The Rain (a song by the Bulgarian singer Vanya Shtereva)

It's raining (by P.I.F)

My First Postcrossing Card arrived!

Recently I registered at a very cool site, called Postcrossing.
The idea is that you send postcards to random people around the world you do not know.
So, I sent two cards - one to a woman in Finland, and one to a guy in Switzerland.
Today I got the great news that my card has arrived in Switzerland and the following answer:
Helle Svetla.
Thank you for the nice postcard.
The eye is very beautiful. I like it a lot.
I must give you quite. Swiss chocolate is really very good.
If you want, I can send you 2 bars of chocolate.
Write me your address if you want.
Many greetings from Switzerland.
Daniel

I am happy that it reached its destination and waiting for a card to reach me now :)

Russian cartoons :)

To all the people that remember and love the Russian cartoons I would like to dedicate the following song.
I just grew up with Nu Pogodi.
There was no American or western cartoons at this time. So we loved them :)
And I just chose that song, as it always makes me remember my childhood and feel so sweetly melancholic.
Enjoy (even though birthdays come only once a year) :)

Happiness

I am feeling happy at the moment. Well, let's say - the closest to happiness that I have been for the last 2 years. Maybe I am just happy of what I am without blaming myself for anything.
Yes, I admit I have made mistakes.
I still do.
But I do not feel , as before, that my mistakes are among the main reasons for something screwing up.
I am happy with the change that is happening - I feel it is going to bring me more opportunities to express myself and to bring more added value to my work.
Yes, sometimes I really feel depressed when I think of all my friends - they are living in different cultures, living these cross-cultural experiences...and I am just ...staying here.
Well, whatever...

I just wanted to post two pictures of the youngest person I know.
His name is Svetoslav and he was born only 42 days ago.
Life is ahead of him and it is full of opportunities!
For me - as well.
From my humble experience - things always happen for a reason. If I have to pass through a stage - I'll just pass. If I am meant to change - I will change.
Accepting this means a lot less stress for me.

My recent "party" song

First heard it at one OSTAVA after-party and have been in love ever since :)

My "goodnight" song

This is one wonderful LOVE song for saying "Goodnight".
And dreaming that I meet a guy like Robert Downey Jr...aaah
Sweet dreams:)
I just couldn't resist to post the lyrics as well.
Goodnight lovers:)
Goodnight dreamers:)

I want love, but it's impossible
A man like me, so irresponsible
A man like me is dead in places
Other men feel liberated

I can't love, shot full of holes
Don't feel nothing, I just feel cold
Don't feel nothing, just old scars
Toughening up around my heart

But I want love, just a different kind
I want love, won't break me down
Won't brick me up, won't fence me in
I want a love, that don't mean a thing
That's the love I want, I want love

I want love on my own terms
After everything I've ever learned
Me, I carry too much baggage
Oh man I've seen so much traffic

So bring it on, I've been bruised
Don't give me love that's clean and smooth
I'm ready for the rougher stuff
No sweet romance, I've had enough

I have been thinking...

Since I watched "Notes on a scandal" I have been thinking that it is not right to judge people for being cruel.
I think I cannot judge Barbara for being so cruel, since she never understood what it is to be loved.
I cannot judge people around me for being malicious - it is their way to survive, to hide from the others that they are actually as fragile as we all are.
I even cannot judge myself for the contempt I feel towards the person I loved just a few months ago.

"Love is not a competition ...

...but I'm winning"
Keiser Cheifs sing in one of their songs.
Which just reminded me of one favourite "love" songe of mine lately.
It reminds me of love that never happened
Love in Paris
Love on the road
Love in a caravane
Gypsy love
Freedom...
L'amour fou...

Resurrection

I am not what I am...
At least i wasn't for the last two years.
I believe I am being closer to my true self each day.
The recovery is based on some basic rules:
Do not regret about the mistakes you have made.
Do not blame yourself for the mistakes of the others.
It is great to be empathic, but the most important thing is you.
Do the things that make you happy.
Notice things.
Love life.

That's it. Life is simple.
We make it difficult with more words than necessary.

My "angry" song

I really like Placebo and I think I can classify more than one from their songs in the "angry" song category.
Here is "The Bitter end"
I think i love Brian's androginy (that must have sounded reaaaaly crazy:) )
Can't wait for the concert!

Planning and random weekend ideas :P

Well, I admit that I have never been so good in planning.
But some plans (or just random weekend ideas) are starting to form in my mind...
Let's see:

This weekend - I have to clean my room, which will take a bit of time...i guess.Then, I will most probably stay home. Maybe visit Koprivshtica on Sunday.

Next weekend ...hm, 21st is a full-time working day.But I might take it off, as I didn't have time to rest at Easter. There is at least to good reasons to visit Varna this weekend. 1st one - there is a Salsa festival, 2nd (more important) - Mury is coming back from the ship...Lots of things we have to share...

Then, comes the 28-29th weekend. No plan for then...except maybe going to see the guys from Capital playing football. Would be great fun:)

The first of weekend of May is a national holiday again (Gergiovden). Megan suggested going to Rodopi mountains. I would love to...

May is not very well planned, but for June i have quite a plan!

1st june (children's day;P) - INXS concert in Sofia

The week after - visit to Krakow to see Mimka and have some rest from work

18th june - PLACEBO concert. I missed the first one, I am definitely NOT missing that one!

Now, in the meantime I accept all kinds of fresh ideas for spending the little free time I have :)

My songs

I just watched the Bulgarian music TV and an actress was presenting her favourite songs. I decide to do so here...
The first thing that comes to my mind is "my travel song" - The Cardigans - My favourite mistake.
I dunno if it is because of the video, but when I hear the song I really want to get on a car and drive at high speed till I go somewhere...In the middle of nowhere:)
Enjoy the video, I am back to French!
C'est la vie...

Easter

Now, it is high time I said Happy Easter, I guess :)
Apart from all the Eastern -Western traditions that are mixing right now in Bulgaria, I really like Easter.
Maybe I am not so convinced in the existence of the Easter bunny (and I really do not know what is the role of the Easter bunny, frankly)and I didn't take part in the colouring of the Easter eggs this year but...
I LOVE EASTER
Because it is a spring holiday.
It is a feast of resurrection and renewed hope.
It is a time of the year when beauty blossoms all around.
You should not feel sad at this date.
Everything is colourful, everybody -smiling :)
And I am back in my hometown, taking all the incredible atmosphere it has to give me.
From the Christian point of view, Christ's resurrection is even more miraculous than his birth.
It is also a time of spending precious minutes with the family and closest friends. And for self-reflection.
Have I been good enough? Am I doing my best? Is this what I want to do? Am I not envious sometimes? Questions questions questions crossing my mind all the time...
Sometimes I wonder what questions other people ask themselves...Are they the same as mine?Or completely different?

Every time we say goodbye I die a little...

I hate being so emotional.
Every time I loose a friend I die...
And I feel so desperate...
I guess it hurts even more knowing that you cannot do anything about it.

AIESEC and non-AIESEC emotions

In the last few days I was
...excited about AIESEC, as Emo invited me on the official panel of BLDS. It is really an honour to be among Koceto, Krasi, Kalin:)
...happy because of AIESEC, when I saw the people applying for LCP of LC Plovdiv. I remembered the old days back in my home LC Varna.
...sad because of AIESEC,because the way the same elections in Plovdiv were organised and ended
I was also excited for I had to take a major risk at work. I had to decide if I am willing to change my field. I did it and I do not regret.
I would never forgive myself if I had missed the chance.
Better regret for decisions made, then for decisions not made...

le monde fou ( random examples that the world has gon crazy:) )

And I like it indeed :)
A pinch of madness brings spice to the daily routine...
So let's see:

My roomate Radi decided to get a new haircut. It was around 2 a.m..So - she just pretended to be a harirdresser and cut her hair off:) I wouldn't risk:)

***
At work, we have those water dispensing machines.The rule is that at each floor a certain amount of water is consumed weekly, otherwise they do not install a machine.And yesterday I saw one of my collegues to pour water from the machine and then - out of the window!She had to do it, otherwise - no water machine. Yet I still consider this a bit irresponsible:)

***
Yesterday in the morning I just decided that I want to go to Plovdiv. Thanks to the sweet Angel who agreed to host me for a night...I have packed my bag and I am leaving in les than 10 hours. Yupeeee :)

Blogging misfortunes

Blogging is a very nice thing.
BUT...there is one big but, as someone used to say:)
Since Saturday, I cannot open my Bulgarian blog which really drives me crazy. I just send a letter to the support team of wordpress and I am keeping a my fingers crossed that I will get an answer.Soon. I hate not knowing...
Besides these blogging misfortunes there is one good piece of blogging news from me:)
Today, a month or so after the idea was born, I started my Real estate blog on the Capital website.
It will be a great challenge for me, as I believe there isn't a good Bulgarian blog on this topic. I have the ambition to make mine one:)

Thoughts at the end of the week :)

It has been a nice week:)
I had the usual dose of stress at work but I didn't care so much.
There were two Bulgarian holidays - the first of march (Baba Marta) when we all tie up the red&white strings (martenitzi) and make wishes. As far as I know there is a tradition like that in Serbia...Correct me if I am wrong, please.
Also, the 3rd of March is the Bulgarian liberation day.
So, I had the reason to be in a festive mood most of the week (especially the later part of it)...
Another good reason - the OSTAVA concert I went to on Friday eve. I accidentially met Katya - a very crazy girl...and the night ended at around 6.30:)Britpop and after that eating "shkembe chorba" (sorry, no translation to that, but anyway - you have to tast it - it is impossible to be explained) with lots of garlic - luckily I didn't eat that.
Some hours ago I watched The last King of Scotland - a deeply moving picture, telling the story of an African dictator in Uganda, killing more than 300 000 people while ruling the country.
Some things made me happy...
-> I watched Irka's pictures from IPM. I love them!!!
-> I tied martenitsi to almost all of my collegues :)
-> I learned that Adi is going on a traineeship. We'll have a party - yupeee:)
-> I saw one friend with his girl. She had that long blong hair...so sweet
-> I decided to apply for a faci of an AIESEC seminar
-> I learned that, even though at work my direct boss doesn't show much appreciation of my efforts, there are people that consider me valuable and would like to work with me if possible
And some things made me sad...
My Dad has serious heart problems.That scares me so much!
Some of my friends are so far away from me.I have no idea if they are all right, what is happening...
I still do not feel at peace with myself
But still - I am waiting to see what this week has got in store for me!
Have a great, sunny and smiling week everyone :)

On this day ...

Sometimes you have a feeling for things before they happen...
Today I felt quite retrospective.
Remembering IPM in the Netherlands.
Thinking how time has flown for me.
365 days have passed since my first post here - I found that while searching the archives.



A lot has changed.
I feel AIESEC quite distant now.
I am working a completely different job from I had